April 18, 2100
I LOVE YOU!
I want to tell you about two things today.
This weekend Rocket got baptized!
Do you remember Rocket? This is all I’ve told you about her so far:
Another one came with a new couple that just moved into our ward. The wife is not a member but she’s gone to church before in another area with him. They’ve been married seven months. She’s never met with missionaries before. She seems a little shy and I don’t want to overwhelm her because sometimes I’m so pumped that I freak shy people out. But I have to talk to her! Of course! So I’m trying to balance my spazziness and be bold without being overbearing. I ask her name and figure out she’s been coming to church for a year and a half.
“What do you like about it?”
“People here are nice. Everyone has this confidence and it seems like they take care of each other. I haven’t learned anything I don’t believe.”
“What do you mean when you say they have confidence?”
“They just live this certain way– like they just know it’s true and they know who they are.”
“Do you want to have that confidence?”
She does! And now we’re teachin her and she is BOMB.
“When we got married, I knew we were going to be okay. But now I know that we will make it. Because we have the gospel,” she said.
Her husband baptized her and everyone cried.
Rocket’s family is from Peru and they are Catholic– at least by culture.
She wanted us to teach them (and everyone else that came) about the Book of Mormon while she dried off and got changed.
So we did and we cried through that too.
And so did her whole family and his whole family and everyone else there.
And then we sang and cried.
And then we prayed and cried.
And then we partied.
We had dinner with all of them and we played with the kids and talked to her family more and it was the most beautiful thing because all those people felt the spirit there. They know this is different. And then they became our friends. And now they are ready to know more. And they’re coming over to Rocket’s house to learn. Everyone’s runnin around with Book of Mormon’s in one hand and tamales in the other.
So much love people! So much love!
I’ve loved teaching Rocket because it has inspired me to be my best self. To do more. Search more. Listen more.
We just go and ask her the questions the spirit tells us to ask.
She self-discovers through her questions.
I haven’t written much in my e-mails about it because I talk so much about her in my letters.
I love this woman!
And they are going to be an eternal family and have little missionary children and oh man! Oh man I love them!
We are changing the world!
Big news time.
Where do I start?
Friday night we were with Glow and her Mom. They’re some of our favorite people. Sister Reynolds was saying goodbye because President said he thought it would be best if she were transferred out of this area. (For safety reasons– long story.) We were ready to find out where Sister Reynolds was going but we wouldn’t know until the zone leaders called the next morning. We got out of the appointment and there was a message for me from President. I called back.
He had some news for me which he dramatically released in three waves.
(so as to allow me sufficient time to freak out in between each one).
“Well Sister Brown, I have some news for you. You’re being transferred.”
This is weird. We were so sure Sister Reynolds was leaving! She already said goodbye to everyone!
“That’s not all Sister Brown, you’re white washing.”
This means that even though I’m brand new to the area, my companion will be also. Neither of us will know the people or how to get around or… anything. Neither of us know dang anything. We will start from scratch and try to build up the area.
“And you’re training!”
This means that my companion will be a brand new missionary and I get to teach her about life.
OH MY GOSH MY LIFE! MY LIFE! THIS IS MY LIFE!
I don’t even remember what I did but I know I yelled and laughed and was a complete spaz. S-P-A-Z.
I don’t think President has ever seen that side of me before.
Here’s another good part of our conversation…
“Sister Brown, I have great confidence in you. I want you to have confidence in you. The things you are worried about in yourself are not as big as you think. I wish I could show you what I see here in our mission. If I could, you would understand who you are. It’s like when I was a Bishop– I would go and have interviews with ward members for hours and hours about all sorts of mistakes and struggles in their lives. It really opened my eyes. When I came home I used to just hug my wife so big and not let go. Why are you hugging me like that? she’d ask. I’d tell her, Because you’re the best! You’re the best and I never realized until now! If you could see the reality of the mission from here, you would be hugging yourself. You’re going to be great.”
Did you hear that? I’m going to be great.
God thinks I can do this.
My new companion’s name is Sister Warr.
(Not like war on me– like war on Satan. I’ve already decided this distinction.)
And we are going to the Santa Clarita Valley to white wash the town down!
Magic Mountain is in our back yard!
All the streets are like SIX lanes each and there are so many white people there!
So naturally I’ve been freaking out ever since.
My brain sounds like this:
Fix the teachin records. Don’t forget the programs in the trunk. Make your greenie a poster. What’s that talk about the power of faith? Oh my gosh what am I doing?! I’m gonna throw up. How are you going to pack your closet? Go spaz in your journ about this. No time. Fireside tonight at 7. Remind Banana about that. Should I tell little Sister Warr that I have no idea what I’m doing or should I act like I’ve got this down so she feels secure…? Make a card for Sister Scrap before you leave. Stop crying. Ask Elder Ball how to whitewash. Ask everyone how to whitewash. Don’t forget to buy milk. How will I get the keys? Can I tape stuff to the walls there? Wash your sheets. She’s in the MTC! I bet she’s packin up her stuff right now! What was I feeling when I did that? Oh no I have Sister K’s book still. And Sister T’s journal. Maybe I should make Sister Warr a journal. Oh! The meeting at noon! How will we make that? Where are my shoes? Banana is calling. Tell her the new Sister is awesome and it’s okay. How can I decorate the Valencia place? Console everyone else who’s freaking out. I’m so hungry. Don’t eat. You’ll puke. What are we teaching tonight? Do we have the post-its? WHERE ARE MY SHOES!
My brain always sounds like that but now it’s ten billion times faster.
Hence the nausea.
Oh man I’ve always wanted to be a trainer.
Even before I knew I wanted to be a missionary, I knew I wanted to be a trainer.
That part sounded fun.
It’ll be fun. It will also probably be lots of other things.
The thing is– I’ve been asking God for this certain type of change to happen in my mission so as to enable a certain type of change in me.
It’s hard to explain but I know he understands what I’m trying to ask for.
And I feel sure that this is an answer to my prayer.
I want to do this, I just have no idea how I’m going to.
Pray for me!
I love you!